In the midst of all the action and drama in Pride and Prejudice between the five sisters, their father, Mr. Bennet, is often cast to the side. This is not a problem, as he prefers staying removed from all of the commotions his daughters cause. However, his doing so is precisely why some of the Bennet sisters are so dramatic in the first place.
Personally, I like Mr. Bennet a lot. When much of the humor in this book is lost on me, his sarcastic remarks keep me drawn in. His conversations with Mrs. Bennet make me laugh the hardest. In the very first chapter, Mrs. Bennet claims that he has no respect for her nerves. He quickly tells her, “I have a high respect for your nerves. They are my old friends. I have heard you mention them with consideration these twenty years at least” (4). He is quick with a joke and never takes his wife’s dramatics seriously, which I can appreciate.
While I have come to enjoy Mr. Bennet’s quips, he does have one major flaw that propels the book, whether readers know it or not. His flaw is certainly his downfall as a character. When his wife and daughters are making a scene or getting themselves into one situation or another, he simply escapes to his library. His contentedness in being left alone is made clearer when Mr. Collins comes to visit. Mr. Bennet is “most anxious to get rid of him and have his library to himself,” when Mr. Collins follows him around the house (49). He is incredibly detached from his home life and family and his actions harm his family more than they help.
Near the end of the book, when Lydia runs off with Wickham, Mr. Bennet is finally forced to pay attention to his children. While he has clear favoritism for Elizabeth, as she is quick-witted like him, he has little interest in the rest of them. He has to track down Lydia but ultimately fails and Mr. Gardiner and Mr. Darcy become responsible for dealing with the matter. This is where the detachment becomes a serious problem, and leaves readers to think about how the Bennets found themselves in this situation in the first place.
I believe there is a healthy medium between disinterest and being a helicopter parent. Mr. and Mrs. Bennet are on opposite ends of the spectrum and are unable to ever find the said medium. While Mrs. Bennet is to blame for Lydia’s actions too, Mr. Bennet, as the head of the household, is expected to help raise his daughters and set expectations. While Jane and Elizabeth seem to turn out fine, the rest of the sisters could have used the guidance of their father. Mr. Bennet is clearly a wise man, so it is unfortunate that he does not share his wisdom with his daughters that lack this trait. If he had been more involved, Lydia may have never run away with Mr. Wickham.
While Mr. Bennet does have a character flaw of not imparting his wisdom to his daughters, I wouldn’t necessarily say it is detachment from his family. From the beginning, Austen does portray Mr. Bennet as a more aloof character as you say. However, his parenting style seems to appear more free-range rather than neglect. Whether you view that as a disinterest for his family, is a whole other argument. When Mrs. Bennet tries to coerce Elizabeth to marry Mr. Collins, Mr. Bennet doesn’t let the marriage occur for Elizabeth’s sake (Austen 97). When Elizabeth urges Mr. Bennet to not let Lydia go on her trip, his reply is simply “Let us hope, therefore, that her being there may teach her her own insignificance” (Austen 196). Or after Mr. Darcy talks with Mr. Bennet about marrying Elizabeth, Mr. Bennet still seeks out Elizabeth’s true feelings, and tells her Darcy’s faults “would be nothing if [she] really liked him” (Austen 315). If Mr. Bennet had true detachment from his family, he wouldn’t have cared for the opinions or feelings of his daughters. He mostly let Lydia go to Brighton not out of disinterest, but in hopes of her being taught humility. I believe what he lacks is assertiveness and the ability to be more proactive in the Bennet household. The problem is not that he doesn’t care; rather, it’s how he believes he shows his care for his daughters.
ReplyDeleteThis post is very interesting to me as I did not realize the possible correlation between instances such as Lydia running off and Mr. Bennet's lack of parenting. However, after reading this post I have to say that I agree. He shows through his actions that he would rather be a stranger in his own life, instead of facing his problems head on. Throughout the novel, there are many examples that prove his purposeful separation from his family. “He left the room, fatigued from the raptures of his wife” (Austen 16). In constantly isolating himself when feeling like his problems are too much, he not only negatively impacts himself, but also the lives of those around him. Additionally, he explicitly states, as you mention, that he picks and chooses which daughters he ‘values’ more. “I must so far differ from you as to think our two youngest daughters uncommonly foolish” (Austen 27). In direct opposition to his wife, he expresses that he thinks the two girls are very ‘silly’. This bothers Mrs. Bennet, and as the novel goes on, the reader sees that while he complains about this, he never makes any active efforts to stop it. This furthers the argument that he does not take on the role he is supposed to as the patriarch of his family, and all of those he cares about around him suffer as a result.
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